While it would be sensible to simply strip off and change into whatever (if any attire) I wanted this is simply not the done thing on a British beach… which is not to say I don’t sometimes do this for fun anyway.
Sometimes I just love venturing onto a public beach fully clothed and carefully undressing to show as little skin as possible while I get changed. I will usually start by removing my bra while it is still under my dress or t-shirt and discretely changing into a bikini top, and this usually draws more attention that if I just whipped my shirt straight off.
The real fun comes in changing into my bikini bottoms as no matter how you attempt this you are going to be naked from the waist down for a fair amount of time. If I’m wearing a dress and feeling particularly flirtatious I’ll remove my pants first, which always increases the odds of a quick flash while I perform my bra to bikini magic act.
When it comes to putting on my bikini bottoms I usually favour sitting down as this means I have to expose my more intimate parts, even if only for a few seconds… anyone watching gets a stolen glance between my legs as I reach forward to pull the bikini up my legs, the dress ending up resting above my hips.
I also have to admit to enjoying wearing tight jeans to the beach and the contortions involved in removing them, sometimes taking my pants with them briefly. This not only gets people to look but sets me up for sitting down and pulling the pants down my legs and over my bent knees, which are of course tightly together and… the return journey which lets everyone briefly have a quick look their arch.
One of my favourite plays is to wear an almost long enough t-shirt while changing, hitched up a little when I sit down to remove my underwear leaving my bottom stays on display for at least a minute.
Sometimes I catch someone trying to stare discreetly at my nudity from behind a book, paper or even sunglasses… if they seem polite about it I’ll often flash them properly before wagging my finger at them. I always remember one young man dropping his book entirely when I caught him out and simply said exasperatedly ‘If you want to see it that badly!’ while moving my knees apart briefly.
…that said there is still some sport in stripping off from the waist down while standing in the middle of a crowded beach before raking in your bag for bikini bottoms, then repeating the same for the top half. It always makes more impact when I go bottom first.